Ten Really Strange Things That Happened at Church Business Meetings

Dead bodies and donuts.

Those are two of the themes of church business meetings.

Recently, I sent an inquiry on social media asking about memorable church business meetings. I was encouraged that some of the responses were positive. Some congregations really do make the meetings a time to make a positive difference.

But most of the responses were, well, strange. For now, I am sharing my top ten choices from those responses.

1. Dead body in dumpster. Church had a prolonged business meeting on whether or not to put a lock on their dumpster. There was no resolution. Within the week someone put a dead body in the dumpster. The church voted overwhelmingly and immediately to put the lock on. I wonder if a pro-lock church member placed the body there.
2. Church name change. I am not surprised this meeting was contentious. This type of change is emotional and far-reaching. But this argument against changing the name was classic: “How will Jesus know who we are when He returns if we change our name?”
3. Donuts. The church had a two-hour meeting discussing donuts. I get it. Donuts are important.
4. Absentee member. Those at the church meeting voted a person to serve in three different positions. But she was not present. That will teach her to miss business meetings.
5. Lawnmower blades. The church had a multi-hour business meeting on what type of lawnmower blades to purchase. Now that’s silly. You should fight over lawnmower purchases, but not the blades.
6. The pastor’s son. The church had three hours of…