Can a Bestselling Christian Marriage Book about Love and Respect Lead to Abuse?

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Can a Bestselling Christian Marriage Book about Love and Respect Lead to Abuse?


(RNS) — There’s not much love lost between Christian marriage and sex blogger Sheila Wray Gregoire and pastor turned marriage expert Emerson Eggerichs.

Or much respect.

The two — both of whom have been featured on Focus on the Family broadcasts — have been feuding for a year over Eggerichs’ bestselling book, “Love & Respect.”

Gregoire says she’s heard from hundreds of women who say one of the book’s main themes — that giving a husband “unconditional respect” can lead to a happy marriage — contributed to abuse in their marriages. She wants Focus on the Family, which originally published the book in partnership with Integrity Publishing, to drop its endorsement.

Eggerichs rejects any claim that “Love & Respect,” which has sold more than 2 million copies since 2004, has contributed to abuse. He believes the book and the ministry that shares its name have helped thousands of couples.  

Like any book, he said, “Love & Respect” could be misused by people with bad intentions.

The dispute over the book has raised enough controversy that Focus on the Family weighed in. Focus issued a statement last week saying Gregoire had “orchestrated a campaign” to discredit Eggerich’s book. According to the statement, Focus continues to endorse Eggerich.

“The fact of the matter is that we believe Mrs. Gregoire has seriously misread and misjudged various aspects…

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